back in the game

Okay, two weeks to catch up on. Sorry to the 5 people who actually read this thing.

Anyways last weekend Christy and I went to the SPCA to get a cat. The funniest thing about the SPCA is that beside every animal they have a fake name they’ve given them as well as a hilarious write up of the animal from the perspective of the animal itself. I would be lying if it didn’t have any effect on the cat we ended up choosing, but it totally did. There was one cat in particular we had our eye on who’s name was “Captain”. His write up was so awesome I copied it from the SPCA to write it down:

AHOY! Attenion all potential forever families, this is your captain speaking…..
Are you looking for a dashing and debonair guy? Then look no further. I am a gentle and smart cat who would just love to find a safe and kind Port of Call for my very own. I love to be touched and brushed and the only thing sweeter than the open seas is a warm lap to curl up in. Come aboard and fall in love. Anchors Away!!

Given the awesome name and the awesome write up we decided to pick up the awesome cat. Right from the get go the signs were good. On top of the fact that he looked a ton like my awesome ex-cat Jeff, even while we were taking him out of the cage at the SPCA he was super chill. He panicked a bit in the car (he actually pooped the box. This was the first time I realized we just got a cat with the stinkiest poop in history) but once we got home he was nervous for about 30 minutes then was hanging out chilling with us all. Before you know it Captain, aka Capadonna, aka big daddy butt stink was pretty much running the roost. The people at the SPCA said he was a stray but it’s hard to believe because of how normal and social he is, plus he’s totally house trained. Perhaps they grabbed him off the street when he had snuck out of the house for two seconds or something. Plus he has some pretty hilarious knock knees so I can’t imagine he would’ve lasted too long in the wild.

That night went out to a party for a friend from work who got a new job in Montreal. Despite what the pictures look like I did have an awesome time. Speaking of which, when did I get the thousand foot prison yard stare? I think my default face is a scowl. I got to work on that. To nail the point home, someone on facebook uploaded a picture of me at a hardcore concert when I was 17 (Im the kid in the far right of the picture). Looking at this picture I realized a few things about myself:

1. No wonder I had no interest in playing contact sports in high school. Look at me! I was an SLF.
2. I remember part of the fun of being straightedge and going to all these shows was how dangerous it all seemed. Angry kids getting together listening to loud angry music sounds like trouble right? Ten years later and the thought of a bunch of mid-pubescent kids NOT drinking and NOT doing drugs seems a lot less dangerous.No wonder the straight edge revolution never took over the world like we all thought it would. It just took over my right leg instead.

Besides taking advantage of a shoe sale, the rest of the week was unfortunately spent being sick with the flu. Thankfully, the weather coordinated with how I felt so I didn’t seem to miss much.

This weekend the weather was way more awesome. Saturday was filled with a bunch of obligations to work and writing classes and stuff but Sunday held up pretty awesomely. To start, me and Christy met her mom for brunch at the restaurant down at the Granville Island hotel. On our way down we saw this poster. Now I ask you, did the owner of that cat really need to put the third point down? Do you think there’s anyone who would be like

“Well, I found a black and white cat with one ear and a squawky meow, but you know what? His character isn’t that cheeky. It’s more sassy. Must not be the same cat.”

After that, said “peace” to el capitano, drove through downtown, over the lions gate bridge, pulled out my steelhead tackle and my home made fishing gloves and finally got to spend an hour fishing at the cap. Unfortunately the water was super ridiculously low. I tried a bit higher up the river but all the rocks were super slippery and dangerous. While I was near the top I saw a dude from the fisheries drop off a summer run steelhead in the pool I was standing at. Awesome! After giving up on the fishing early I still wanted to take advantage of the clear day so I drove up the mountains and checked out some parks I hadn’t seen before. When I pulled off the road and walked up to the park I was pretty blown away by the view.

On the way back into town I stopped at famous noodle, a noodle soup place where they make the noodles fresh right in front you. After that me and Christy headed down to meet up with Scott and his Australian girlfriend at an Australian bar for “Australian day”. The place was packed with Aussies and people pretending to be them. It was rowdy, rude and loud, basically what I was expecting from a room full of Aussies. The weirdest thing of the night though happened in the bathroom. It changed my view of Aussies forever.

While waiting in line to pee a guy in front of me in the urinal said “Oi, now it’s gunna cam out the otha end mate”. Then he walked over to the toilet stall yelled “Get out mate.I gutta shet!” So a freaked out looking dude comes out of the stall and this guy runs in. 2 seconds later he blasts a super loud stinky fart. Everyone in the line went “Ohhhhh!” but right after, the guy goes “Wait until you smell it mates. I’ll have you all runnin’ fore the door!” What was so weird about it was that the Aussie on the can and the Aussies in line kept going back and forth talking about the guys poop. Like the entire time I was in the bathroom. What kind of people do that? I’m never listening to Midnight Oil again.

With all that said, good weekend. Back in the swing of things again and I’ll start updating this thing again more often. Peace out.